Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
