I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Randomize
