it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
this just has baby written all over it
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
