yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
Randomize
