we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
Randomize
