i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
I currently don't understand fingers.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Randomize
