do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Randomize
