He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
I just gift wrapped bread.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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