spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
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