"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize