ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
