At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
