Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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