I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
