I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
