So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
Randomize
