so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
Dear god my vagina.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
