At least make sure they are 18
Why
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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