Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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