i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
Randomize
