she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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