Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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