I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize