im drinking this country out of the recession.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Randomize
