Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
