i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Randomize
