Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
Randomize
