Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
