What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
