I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
