a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize
