Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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