you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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