Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
Randomize
