just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
