Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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