I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Randomize
