oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
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