Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Randomize
