And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
