How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
even my farts smell like vagina
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
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