I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
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