Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
Randomize
