I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Randomize
