they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
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