I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
