tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
Randomize
