I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Randomize
