found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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