Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
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